Here is something all of us can do.
Every day, make an effort to rejoice in the success of others: particularly success with things that you want for yourself.
Think of someone and imagine him or her having a breakthrough, and find that place in yourself that makes you feel happy for that person.
Pierce through the pang of jealousy. Let your love for humanity shine through and dispel the darkness of meanness: the close-mindedness, the Gollum-face, the hardened ugliness of being petty and ungrateful.
You want children? Find that sincere happiness for your friend who just gave birth. Longing for a romantic partner? Wish that couple that just got together all the love in the world. You sometimes yearn for a bigger car, or more money? Seek out stories of your acquaintances or even strangers who “made it” recently and open your heart to spur them on, to wish them even more success.
Say a silent prayer for them, and imagine you beaming golden light of success, happiness, and fulfillment in their direction. Imagine them smiling and radiating and in complete balance.
When you hear about the success of someone, particularly if it is about something that you miss in your own life, feel that pang of jealousy—it is only human and nothing to be ashamed of. But immediately transcend it by sincerely wishing that person well. This act of transforming a pang of jealousy into something positive, generous, well-intentioned, will bring immediate happiness and joy to you—and make the world a little better.
And it will, in the long run, grow your soul and bring you the fulfillment you are craving—although you can’t know what form it will take, or when it will happen. Be prepared for positive surprises, and recognize the opportunity when it presents itself.
But what about competition, you might say? Isn’t that a healthy thing that helps us push forward?
Only competition against yourself. We haven’t come here to compete against others, but to compete against our own lower nature, our own mistakes and bad habits, our own illusions about ourselves and the world. Success and competitiveness come as a consequence of that. (And yes, nothing wrong with competitiveness in that sense.)
Practice this every day, and it might change your life, even if it takes some time. It might even change history.
What do you have to lose except your misery?
Very good reminder - thanks Luc!